Sunday, December 14, 2008

25 Random Things About Me

Recently, a very dear playwright friend of mine posted a note on her Facebook page.

25 Random Things About Anne.

Except for item Number 9: “At one time, I did a lot of puppet shows. They were not very good.”---I was unaware of ANY of these things about her.

It was a wonderful little patchwork quilt of her life so far. I was so inspired; I decided to try a list of my own.

25 Random Things About Me

1. My great-grandfather was a riverboat gambler on the Mississippi. Before that, he rode in a D-List Jesse James-style gang with his brothers.

2. My first word was “Apple”. I didn’t want an apple. I wanted Apple Jacks.

3. In college, I once interviewed Metallica. They told me I was the only girl who’d ever interviewed them with her hair in pigtails.

4. I am part Native-American. A tiny part. But my great-grandmother was too ashamed of the ancestry to ever tell anyone which tribe. We suspect Cherokee.

5. I used to hate liver. Now I kind of like it.

6. A few years ago, I had a pet mouse named Bitty. When she got a tumor, I spent $500 at the vet having it removed. Two months later, it was back and I took her into the vet to have her put to sleep. That was another $50. They gave me a few minutes alone with her before the end. I petted her little head and cried. I still miss that little mouse.

7. The first time I played golf, I “chipped one in”.

8. I was potty-trained by being given a penny and a Smarty Candy every time I used the little potty. I used the money to buy a Snow White Sticker Fun Book.

9. Sometimes, when I’m happy, I have to go off to a quiet corner and jump up and down.

10. On my desk, I have a dead killer bee in a jar.

11. When I was little, people were always asking me what I wanted to be when I grew up. I decided I wanted to be a Saint.

12. My Mom and my Aunt taught me to sing harmony with them to Lennon Sisters albums.

13. My parents divorced when I was a baby. My father died when I was thirteen. The only time I remember seeing him was at his funeral.

14. No one makes better lentil soup than me. No one!!!

15. After I broke my jaw, I was on heavy doses of Percocet. My mind was all hazy and I was homesick for family and thinking of good times when I was a kid. Two weeks later, when I was feeling somewhat better, there was a knock on my door. It was the postman. He delivered a giant box filled with a dozen boxes of Frankenberry Cereal. I had completely forgotten that in my Percocet haze, I had ordered an entire case of it online.

16. At the Louvre, I almost knocked over a statue.

17. I was once in New Orleans during a hurricane. Not THE hurricane. The year before. It turned out to be just sprinkles.

18. My secret wish is to do an Apache Dance with Tom Waits.

19. In high school, I was habitually ten minutes late for school. If you were late, you had to go to the Principal’s Office and get an Admittance Slip from the secretary, Margie, explaining why. It got boring telling her, “I overslept”. So I would make up long stories about an elephant sitting on the car or a giant beanstalk growing in the driveway. Margie would listen to my stories and write on my Admittance Slip, “Beanstalk in Driveway.” Sr. Christine, my homeroom teacher, would read it and shake her head.

20. I once planned a party for fifty people---and forgot to show up.

21. Every month, I send money to a little boy in India thru Children International. His name is Sanju. My mother complains that it’s the only grandchild she’ll ever have.

22. I once had a fan. She was kind of weird.

23. When I’m depressed, I open a Microsoft Word program and write everything down. Once I’m finished, I delete it.

24. Once, a guy called me for a second date. I actually said that I couldn’t go out with him that night because I had to stay home and wash my hair. Had NO idea it was Bette Davis’ famous kiss-off line! I really did have to wash my hair. Needless to say, he never called again.

25. I love getting catalogs in the mail. It makes me feel pertinent. Pertinent is my favorite word. And if I’m not watching myself, I tend to spell “favorite” with the British spelling, “favourite”.